Still can't believe that I actually sacrificed almost half of my sleep finishing up two Chemistry tasks.

Weird though, my parents and relatives are here for holiday trip,

Yet somehow, everything fell into place, just to re-assemble my motivation again.

*Firstly, and foremostly, talking things out with my dad. I used to strategise with him how to get myself pumped up. Now I know how to KEEP myself pumped up. No more flickering of the fire inside me, at least 'till Promos are over.

*Seeing my mom. That made me remember how I've gotta be grateful for this wonderful family I have and bringing glory to my family is the only way to repay them. I didn't travel all the way from Jakarta for nothing.

*My brother has been trying hard and yes, he's now coping well as a scholar. I cannot lose to him. Haha. All my failures shall not stand in my way anymore.

*Talking about Australian universities with my aunt. Reminds me of my aim; the future I've been dreaming of.

*Accompanying my parents to hospital for check-ups. The aura of the hospital, the clicking of keyboard and the ringing of the phone at the receptionist area, the sound of stretchers being moved around, the siren of the ambulance, the quietness of the clinics corridors, the coldness of the still air, the nameplates of many doctors and their degrees, the smell of medicine-like air..

Yes, this is where I know I wanna belong to be, with a white robe over me, and a stethoscope over my neck.

While somehow a bit of the holiday mood is seeping into me,

I can still hold it back, luckily.

No mood to play hardcorely, still left a lil' bit of urge to grab a book and study.

Whatever it is, I can't give up. I mustn't.

For my dream, my family, God and myself.

"I can do anything through Christ who strengthens me." - Philippians 4:13