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OhLaila
Sunday 21 June 2015
It's amazing how a short getaway trip can be.

Ah finally it's my mid-semester break again.
It's my last one as an undergraduate student!
I'm usually the more stay-at-home, lazying around and just sleeping the whole day kinda guy, especially in the way I spend my holidays and my breaks.
This term tho, I decided to do something a little different.




It all started with one of my friends who found out about a travel deal online for just $75 and suggested a few of us from SUTD to go for this short 2D1N trip to Batam.
I would usually say no, for obvious reasons.
I would rather have spent my break at the comfort of my own room, and I would also worry about the possibility of having a lot of work to do.
But I figured I would still have work to do even if I don't go anywhere in the end anyway.
And this is also my last recess week probably, why waste it by doing nothing just like what I would always have done?
So I thought "why not?" And the package seems quite both legit and worth it, seeing as how it included:

*2-ways Ferry Ticket
*A city tour that brought us along to some local eateries like a chocolate factory, local snack shops, layered cake bakery and a factory outlet, as well as a Buddhist temple and a durian plantation
*Seafood lunch that includes shellfish, prawns, flower crabs, squid, and fish
*1-night stay at a 4-starred hotel
*Which also include a buffet breakfast
*1-hour full-body massage


Of course that was not all that we did.
We also went to find our own food for dinner on the first day and lunch on the second day,
Dipped in the hotel jacuzzi and soaked in the sauna,
As well as went for another round of extra massage and body scrub, while some of us went for a karaoke session and a movie.
Not forgetting splashing some amount of cash to buy various flavors of Indomie and some snacks from our childhood days.


It was a pleasant trip that made me forget about all my problems, even just for a while.
And after I came back, I knew that it was what I really needed.
My escapism should not just be limited to be doing stuff online and playing games online.
Of course that it could work, but maybe a real escapism could have done better.
And indeed it did.




One thing I noted tho.
In the evening on the first day, the group decided to walk to a nearby mall which is within walking distance from our hotel after we had our dinner,
It was actually really near and we could have walked faster if not for the poor construction of the walking pavement on the roadside.
But that was not the problem.
The problem lies in the way I feel unsafe walking at night in my own country.
I was anxious of things that could happen to us, like robberies, scams, or worse still, kidnapping.
Especially since we are all from Chinese minorities.
Yes a lot of the younger Indonesians have all embraced the diversity in our cultures and all,
But bad things still do happen.
I mean, Indonesia is supposed to be more like a home to me, but it's strange that I probably feel safer walking around at night even in foreign countries such as the States and the UK, for example, places that I've never been to before.
I just find that this is a very sad problem for Indonesia and its people,
And I hope to see the day where I can walk around on my own, enjoying the night sceneries and the occasional buzz of activities and experiencing them with all my five senses instead of just seeing things from inside the vehicle or a building.




Anyway, here are some of the photos we took!


















Photo credits for those that aren't mine:
Willa Trixie Ponimin
Gabrilla Samsir
Katherine Fennedy
Anthony Setiawan
Felicia Amy Hadipranata




I'm glad I took a little leap of faith this time.
Sure, my work will always be there, but I might not even spend so much time had I still been here all weekend.
Yikes! That reminds me, I should probably get back to work!


再见!



Wednesday 3 June 2015
"How do you know if you truly have gotten over someone?"

Seems a simple question.
Or so I thought, usually.


I don't know if what I feel here is still real or simply the remnants from the past.


Yeah what I experienced 5-6 years ago was nothing short of pure emotional bliss, that comes with the excruciating pain when it had to be ended of course.
It was, if not still is, my biggest love.

I wouldn't say getting over it is easy. It was nothing like that.
I never imagined getting over this one.
Until I thought I did!
I met new people and made new memories, both as friends and beyond.


Until the scars tore apart again yesterday, or so it seemed.
I felt it all again after I finished meeting up with my group of best buddies from FTPSS.
I do meet up with these treasured people once in a while.
Though not once had it triggered the past events as much as it did this time.
Somehow, this time the meet-up it became the causal factor in reminding me of you.

There was no further need to say what followed after that when I went home.
I was filled to the brim with melancholy, unable to do anything productive as much as I want to.
I spent the rest of the evenings, and the next day re-visiting the past (as well as realising that I've lost some of the important archives).
Then came the pangs of regrets, and the heartbreaks once again.



I mean, how do I explain all of these then, if what I felt was just imaginary?
How do the scars manage to open up again?
How do these scars still exist?
How did the meet-up this time trigger all these chains of emotional events?
How do I know I am missing what we had, the person you once were, the deep and profound connections I have with someone on that level, or the person you are now?

Why do I still hope?
Why do I hold on so much to it?
Why is it still so important to me now?

More importantly,
What do I do now?
Do I fight this feeling?
Do I just let it be, or do I suppress it?




Goodnight, bloggie.
I'm out.







how are you doing now?