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OhLaila
Wednesday 27 March 2013
Contentment

It's rare to find myself being contented about life and school in general nowadays.


It's even more so to realise that today(or yesterday, whatever) has been a fantastic, if not near-perfect day!



From order of happenings:

*Knowing how to do Python quiz within seconds of reading the questions with my half-loaded brain after a groggy sleep. Though in the end I got it a little wrong, 'cause of a little lack of theoretical knowledge.


*Understanding ALL (if not most) case problems that were issued out in Thermal Physics class. For the first time in this whole term. Kudos for the lecturers who decided to review the concepts first before throwing us into the waters.


*HIGHLIGHT OF THE DAY: Jackie Chan (YES, the legend himself!) visited my campus as part of his plan to build 4 Ancient Chinese structures on SUTD's permanent campus in the future. Managed to get myself into a group photo with him, with him less than an arm's length away from me. :D


*Understanding Math class. For the first time since.. Weeks?


*Managed to study Physics' past weeks case problems with a clear and motivated mind. So much win, given that I'm usually super lazy and idle.


*Best yet: cohort problems for Python and Physics homework deadlines were both extended. No more need to rush my work -> study with an even brighter and calmer mind.


*Surprise visit for Clifford's 21st birthday with a truckload of schoolmates. Was amusing seeing his bed (and the area around it) converted into pink and decorated with SNSD's posters. Hahaha.


*Solved Python cohort problems mostly on my own. I forced myself not to ask someone else to guide me through a whole question. Oh, the joy when you managed to get your code working after so much struggles of trial-and-error was simply overwhelming.




Well those are about all of them already!

If there's one downside for now,
Is realising that tomorrow morning will be the usual battle between me and my bed (plus my sleepy head).
And they're strongest in the morning, especially if I go to sleep this late.
They get stronger for every second that I spend not sleeping.


So,
Ciao for now!


Thursday 14 March 2013
Some lessons, you just need to learn the hard way!

Totally got that phrase stuffed in my face last night.



To put it shortly,
I got so wasted last night, I didn't remember half the things I said and caused really a great trouble for some of my friends (who ended up bailing me out of the situation I landed myself into).



It all began when a friend invited me to join clubbing out of the blue after the orientation dry run.
I was really reluctant; I'm not much of a clubber to begin with.
The last time I went to a club, I didn't even enjoy the things the right way. Or so I believe.
But then, since I realised quite a large number of my schoolmates were gonna go, I thought it would have been different, since it was with people I at least know anyway. Most of them.


And I was right. It was SO different from what I did before.
We actually drank before we got into Zouk and I couldn't remember how many shots I drank after my 3rd.
In fact I actually thought I managed to down like 6 or 7 shots in total.
I was still all right before heading into the club. Just tipsy somehow, and a little high.



Next, on the dance floor.
I was so stoned I only remembered trashing and jumping around randomly since it was so packed like a sardine can anyway.
What actually happened was actually I ended up dancing with a couple of my schoolmates, and I totally couldn't recall any of that.
Well, maybe the bits and pieces of that.
Next thing I knew, my head was spinning so hard that it felt as if my ears went muted.
And afterwards, came what I had been trying so hard to suppress.
Puke was all over my nostrils, and the floor, and a few of my friends.
And I think blacking out for a few moments was what came next.
All I have in my brain now is being dragged outside by a couple of my friends afterwards.
While people around me cleared away from my surroundings, some in shock while some in utter disgust.
Outside, I was given a glass of water from one of them who dragged me out, and if I'm right, this is what happened:



"
Friend1: Give him a glass of water, quick!
*waits*
Friend2: Nah, here water.
Me: *grabs the glass and drank with mess*
Me: *thinking I already gave him the glass back; loosens my grip*
*PYANG!*
Friend2: What the fuckkkkk! OMG! I said "thanks bro!" to the bartender, how am I gonna give it back to him?!
Friend1: Aiya I don't think he'll remember.
"
And I passed out.


Moments later,
I remember lying on the pavement on the street across Zouk; mouth cavity filled with remnants of my puke and head pounding like a lion dance percussion, while groaning in embarrassment and apology.
I saw another friend next to me, who ended up dragging me out while I blacked out and taking care of me until much, much later.
I couldn't imagine what would happen if I just fainted without warning on the dance floor alone. I think I would just literally die of internal injuries stampeded by people high on alcohol.
Well, after that I closed my eyes and drifted into darkness again.


Later, again,
I woke up, still on that same pavement, this time cradled on the laps of my friend. This time noises were in higher level, and I saw a few of my schoolmates laughing at/with me, not too sure which is which because sometimes I ended up laughing too. All I remember was me mouthing out incoherent, random words and phrases that do not make any sense and I was totally not like how I normally am.
It's like my subconscious knew something is wrong, but was too intoxicated to do anything about it. I couldn't even move, much less control my own limbs to move the way I wanted them to.
Well, I puked a little more, but this time more terribly because it was just hydrochloric acid spurting out of my nasal cavity.
It was fucking, fucking terrible.
My throat hurt like shit and it burns so much I thought I could start breathing fire soon.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, was THE MOMENT I KNOW THAT I SHOULDN'T PUSH THE LIMITS OF MY ALCOHOL TOLERANCE RECKLESSLY.



After blacking out for countless times,
I guess 3 of my friends decided that I should be brought back to the hostel already. They were dragging me along the street to the main road, so that we could grab a taxi.
But damn it, DAMN IT! I just had to vomit out more acid. ON THE FUCKING WAY TO THE MAIN ROAD.
I heard more astonished and repugnant expressions from people. But I couldn't give a shit.
I couldn't even stand properly. How the fuck could I control my involuntary gag reflex.
Although I found after that unconsciously that it was no longer the alcohol that caused the long-lasting nauseatic effect, but it was the taste and smell of puke in my mouth.
I drifted into darkness again on the cab back home, but I remember that I got dragged into a friend's apartment unit.
I STILL could not move my limbs, until I was showered with warm water.
I suddenly managed to stand up and cleansed myself, but not without giddiness still.
He was kind enough to let me use his pants and long-sleeve shirt.
Not only that, he even let me sleep in his bed.
After my last bout of vomiting in his bathroom, I finally asked for a medicated oil to relieve the terrible smell of my nostrils, but none had it.
Not that it mattered, by the time I was on the bed, I actually smelled all the good stuff from the fresh clothes, and I managed to sleep, finally in peace.
While my friend slept outside in the couch, and my other friend who took care of me from when I started blacking out helped me to wash up my soiled attire.






I was really, really fortunate that I wasn't alone when all that happened.
And to have friends who didn't bail out when I practically turned into an epitome of chaos.
That was a really, really hard lesson to learn from.
All I wanted initially was to merely enjoy myself.
But I turned myself into a joke in front of others.






But that aside, you know where else I was fortunate?
I was able to wake up this morning in time for my first-aid course.
Without an alarm, without a hangover.



Thursday 7 March 2013
Hi!

It's me and my delusions again.






Just had the first of my midterms today. Python Programming!!
Simple programmings for expert programmers I suppose, but I really think it's fun!
Now I'm really swayed towards taking the Information Systems Technology and Design (ISTD) pillar instead of taking my initial choice of Architecture and Sustainable Design (ASD).
I like both. And I'm really pressed to make the choice, really, really soon.




And despite the content-heavy Thermodynamics exam on Friday,
I haven't studied any today.
Thinking that I at least deserved a break.
Oh, what a typical post-exam mentality of mine.



I even had the nerves of practicing DoTA 2 and played guitar for the supposedly planned, super-late covers with a couple of my classmates.

I gotta admit, it felt really great.
At least I can feel the enjoyment in something I do.
Today I discover two of them, in fact, and I'm really glad.
Maybe God had put me here, where I am, for a reason.
Maybe Fate has its plans too.








But these delusions have to stop.


The delusion about having so much free time at hand,

The delusion about being able to breeze through the exams,

And of course,
The delusion that I've tried so hard to suppress,
The delusion that I've found a person to fall back on emotionally and trustworthy enough for me to confide in.


Yes, they ALL have to stop.