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OhLaila
 Saturday 26 November 2011

A Level is down to two more MCQ papers.



Whatever has passed, has passed.
It isn't within my control anymore.


Gotta focus on the rest. But the break is very tempting to take. ==


Anyway,
Christmas decorations are already up and about along the stretch of Orchard Road.
That's early. O_O
But still, they bring out the Christmas mood already.


I love Christmas mood.
Spending the time savouring the aura of Christmas along Orchard with the right person makes it all even better, if not best.




But for now,
It's time to go back to exam mode.
It's the final lap of the final lap. Haha.


Tuesday 15 November 2011
Blitz of electrical impulses; Fragments of thoughts.

Contemplated to write something on Tumblr but I guess I'll stick with the good ol' Blogger after all. This place holds a huge archives of memories, literally.



So,
It's the second week of the bloodiest academic battle that I'm going through.
And it's torturing me inside out.
Even after today, which everyone was happy about (apparently),
I discovered that I still am not allowed to be happy.


No matter what,
There's just something that screws up.




That's the annoying thing.
But that's also where I learnt.



Yeah, something will always screw up.
It's whether I can handle the things that come.
Meeting Yi Chao for a drink a while and talking it out with him made me realise that.

Why should I worry, why should I pressurise myself?
I mean, how many times have I told myself again and again that I just have to give it my all?
That only I can define "doing my best" best?
And that nothing, or no one, else shall affect my own perspective?


A Level results are important, that's definite.
But it ain't the most important factor.

All roads lead to Rome.
And through the same way shall I head towards my own dreams.


Friday 4 November 2011
-

If anyone wonders what that title shows,
I'm about to describe why.



I'm a being who attracts negativity. I think.
After being screwed by a subject I call my favourite (currently), i.e. Chemistry,
My brain suddenly drew a connection.


If I'm to be placed in the Periodic Table,
I'm probably somewhere in Period 1, in between Group V to VII.
Yeah I'm probably Nitrogen, Oxygen, or Fluorine.
The elements in the Table who have the highest affinity for negativity aka electrons.




That's what I thought.



Let's see again,
Okay, I can be positive at times.
But I can't be Group I metals,
'Cause I don't lose negativity and be positive all the time.



Could I be Carbon?
Technically, and biologically, yes I am.
Human beings are carbon-made organisms.
But in this case, no.
Carbon exists as neutral compounds naturally.
They don't get positive, yet they aren't negativity-magnet wherever they go.



So am I a Hydrogen?
It has equal affinity to attract negativity and be positive.
It is small.
It is explosive.
It is not special. It's common.
In the Table, it's placed away from every other elements.



Yeah
It has to be.



I've deduced it.
That's where I probably will be categorised in.
I can be positive, although I think nowadays I have such strong affinity with negative aura.
I'm small, literally.
My emotions don't really own a remote control.
I'm a mediocre being.
And it's probably best if I am put into isolation, away from everybody else.


Haha, nobody talks in such a nerd way about their own selves.
This is why.







Weird.
My writing mode surfaced at the time I least want it to appear.
I shouldn't be using my brain for this.
I should be working my ass off for my fucked-up subjects.
Or at the very least,
I should be brushing up my own smashed-into-little-pieces crappy self-confidence.
Nothing works.
Nothing helps to salvage the remnants of my optimism.






Now, anybody still doesn't understand what the title shows?




I was trying to say Negative.


Wednesday 2 November 2011

And the single-digit countdown began a few days ago.



Yep, I can feel that this "final lap" has its hairs brushing on my neck.



I have to do this, for my own dreams.



But then again,
I wonder what those dreams of mine could be actually like...